Rajanikanth

Rajni is back with new ones.

Recently china airports wer closed due to heavy fog.
Later it was discovered that Rajanikanth was smoking in India!!

Rajanikanth did his KG from seven different places..
Today those places are known as IITs!!

Government of india pays tax to Rajankanth for living in India!!

Definition of solar eclipse: When Rajanikanth stares at sun with anger, sun hides behind the moon. This greates phenomena is called Solar Eclipse...!!

Rajanikanth woke up one day and decided he should share at least or percent of his knowledge with the world..
Thus, the google was born!!

Think what would have happened if Rajani would have born 150 year ago??
British would have fought for Independance..

Best Rajani joke!!!!!!
Even Ghajini remembers Rajani!!!

An email was sent from Mysore to Bangalore.
Rajanikanth stopped it at Mandya..

Why do earthuake occurs??
Because at that time Rajanikanth's mobile is on vibration mode!!

Once Rajanikanth bunked a whole day in school..
Since then that day is known as Sunday!!

The pyramids in Egypt are actually Rajani kanth's primary school craft projects!!
Breaking news : ISRO does not exists anymore...
Rajanikanth purchased all the rokets for Diwali celebration!!

Why did Rajani buy an acre of land with 4 wells on each corner..
to play Carron

Before Tom Cruise, Rajani was approached for the movie Mission Impossible, but Rajani refused as he found the title insulting....
hahahahahahahahah....................

Arz Kiya Hai

अर्ज़ किया है ...
गौर फ़रमायेगा ...
 देखा उन्होंने तिरछी नज़र से,
कसम खुद की मदहोश हो गए हम,
पर जब पता चला नज़र पर्मानेट  तिरछी है,

तो वही खड़े-खड़े बेहोश हो गए हम.

Single Point Focus

My grandfather lived for 96 years & he never used glasses.

Santa: ya, i know,

some people in my family also drink directly from the bottle.

Chaand Badlo Me Kho Gaya

दिल के आँगन से चाँद का दीदार हो गया,

में उसका दीवाना हो गया,

चाँद बादलों में खो गया,

मैंने बादल हटने का इंतज़ार किया

तब तक चाँद किसी और का हो गया !

YE AANSU NA HOTE

 जो ना होती मोहब्बत ये आंसू न होते,

दिल भी न खोता आज तन्हा ना रोता,  

दीवानों सी अपनी ये हालत न होती,

अगर जहान में  कम्बखत ये मोहब्बत न होती,

There is nothing more Expensive

There is Nothing more expensive than a Female Tear....
when a single drop comes out, it first mixes with "loreal" eyeliner and "dior" mascara.
.
.
.
.
then when it come down to cheek it mixes with "D&G blusher"...
.
.
.
and in case it touches the lips, it gets mixed with "Maybelline" lipstick
.
.
.
this means that a single drop is worth at least Rs.1500..... :)
Don't ever let ur girl cry.... 

New Generation Kids...

Photographer studio me 6 saal ke bachey se bolta hai :
Meri taraf dekho beta is camera se kabutar niklega.

Bacha:
Focus adjust kar
Jaahilon wali baat mat kar,
Portrait mode Use karna,
Macro k sath,
ISO 200 Ke andar Rakhna,
High Resolution me pic aani chahiye
Facebook pe upload karni hai warna paise nahi milenge.

"Chutiyaa kubutar Nikaalega.."

Letter To Love Guru

Letter to love Guru

"My strange love story.... I'm in love wtih a boy who is far away from me... I'm in India and he is in UK. We met on a marriage website.  Became friend on fb... Had long chats on whatsapp... Proposed each other on skype... And now viber is there....And today we two months of our relation....I need your blessings and good wish...."

Love Guru:- Now get married on Twitter and send him your kids through yahoo messenger or else you can byu your kids from Flipkart
If you fed up of your kids later than toh OLX pe bach de he he he :)

After Watching Movie

After watching movie Ye Jawani Hai Deewani...

A boy to his father . . .

Boy-Papa main udna chahta hu, girna chata hu, daudna bhi chahta hu... bus rukna nai chahta
Father:- Ye le mobile temple run khel le..

Men Are Honest Liars

A Woodcutter lost his iron Axe then he prays to god for return his axe & lord Offered him silver axe. He denied. Lord then offed him god axe. He further denied. Lastly Lord offered him iron axe which he accepted.
seeing his honesty Lord gives him All 3.

One day he goes Again 2 forest with his Wife. but his Wife falls into the River, he cries and pleads 2 the Lord to give him his Wife...
''is this ur wife'
He Replied - Yes.!
Lord said ''you led and you are gonna be punished'...
He said,"wait Lord I lied because if i had said no, you would have taken out Cameron Diaz.
If then I said no, you Would have taken out my wife and seeing my honesty, you would have given me all 3.
but i am a poor man, i can't keep all three. so I said Yes to Angelina.
god: rulayega kya pagle.... ja le ja isse...
Moral: Men Are Honest Lears 

USES OF WATER

Drinking more water can help you lose weight!
Studies have shown that staying hydrated with sufficient water while exercising can result in the ability to complete more reps and remain energized. This means the simple act of drinking enough water can directly increase the number of calories you'll burn, because you'll have more energy during you routine that you would have had if you were insufficiently hydrated.